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Review:Pen2Paper says:
Hey again,
It's Pen2Paper from the forums here with your requested review.
I'm so sorry it's taken such a long time to get this review out but my multitasking capacity has been maxed out these past few weeks and I've been incredibly busy.

Anyways onto your review. Overall your chapter is warm, familiar and a joy to read. It is so nice the way you brought back to life the supporting characters JK Rowling described in the books. I would have liked to see a bit more of Fred and George but that's alright, this chapter was well written and I enjoyed it thoroughly.

Your structure and content is good, although there was less happening here the chapter still felt full and thorough.
Flow and pace were perfect and the descriptions were well balanced and nicely presented.

It was really nice to visualise everything you described, especially at the library scene which was the main focus I think and was given exceptional detail.
I love love love, how realistic you've kept the whole thing.
With Alicia turning over her shoulder to look at the door to see if Lora was coming over. etc things like that really made this chapter very believable.
Also it is nice how you've conveyed with a few short choice words how close the three friends are with Angie saying that they knew Lora's best friend spot was filled over building blocks and wax crayons. Very nice touch. It really brings out how deeply they understand each other and fits your OC perfectly between Angie and Alicia! Very very nicely done!

Additional appearance of Lee Jordan was perfect and entertaining. He was exactly as I remember him from the books ( as were Alicia and Angie) with his comic flair and sarcasm. I love it! You've done a wonderful job keeping all the characters Canon and for that I highly commend you and your excellent writing skill. Especially Angie I feel is written well and although this is the first time I'm reading a story about them I have to admit I'm very intrigued about her story.

Alicia's reaction to Lee asking to ask Eddie out for her was priceless.
All in all nothing but good things to say about this chapter. You've obviously put in a lot of thought and constructed your chapters well.

Good luck with future Chapters. Hope you keep up the good work!
~Pen2Paper

Author's Response: Hey! Never feel the need to apologize for being busy!! I totally understand. I'm just glad to see your review and to hear that you're enjoying the story so far!! I can see how you may want to see more Fred and George in the body of these chapters, but they are told from Angelina's POV and so unless the twins are with her, they won't be appearing in the chapter in order to maintain the integrity of my third person limited pov. Description is one of my favorite facets of writing. I always am a bit nervous about overdoing it, so hearing thatyou enjoyed it and found it to be effective for the chapter is awesome and a half!! I've had a lot of fun characterizing the minor characters here!!

Thank you so much for your review!! I really appreciate it
Melissa

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