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Review:Hogwarts27 says:
Well, congratulations on another excellent piece. The first few paragraphs with the scene setup at Hogwarts could still use some editing. The scene setup felt longer than it needed to be, and you explained details that weren't even really needed to prepare the reader for getting into the character's feelings. If you ever decide to edit the first few paragraphs, I might suggest that you experiment with leaving out any explanation of what Potter fans already know, and simply focus on creating an ominous mood of impending danger as your setup. I think one of those ominous beginnings you're so good at writing would be a great way to lead into this piece (just my humble opinion) so that whole piece does nothing but create emotion from the very first sentence.

That said, once you got into the character's memories this piece flows beautifully. Particularly from the paragraph where he displayed magic at age 7 to the end is truly captivating. I didn't want it to end. And I loved the way it did end. Excellent one-shot.

Author's Response: This has got to be one of my top 5 reviews that I've ever received. Your humble opinion means so much to me.
Thinking back to my opening chapter/s I can pretty much see where your coming from. I will look at it again and see what I can do. And thanks for saying that I'm good with the ominous beginnings.
Overall I enjoyed writing this and I hope others enjoy it as much as you did. Thanks once again for the read and super awesome review.

By the way. I've now posted my writers duel entry. If you've not read it yet during the voting stage, please look out for The Surprising Life of Hermione Granger.


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