Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:charlottetrips says:
Char here with your requested review! I truly loved the other stories I’ve read of yours, so I’m coming to this story with anticipation! I’m sure you won’t disappoint!

I’m wondering where we’ll be going with your story being titled “Fried Eggs”.

My first impressions of Marianna are that she’s studious and loves being able to be the know-it-all but she’s not finding it so easy as, let’s say, Hermione would. That transition from being two peas in a pod to suddenly being the third wheel is aptly described here, though you don’t necessarily say it. You’re just describing the feeling and I’m totally getting it! I, unfortunately am of Marianna’s best friend type, having gotten married before my best friend but she bears it up pretty well.

I’m loving the inner monologue of Marianna and the problems she’s having in trying to get the perfect research done for her essay and just about anything you’ve described for her. She is so Ravenclaw and I’m interested to hear how her character will develop (if you’ve got those plans in mind).

Oh, eggs on a book…right…I guess I can see where this is going.

Not really.

So I guess I’m going to have to read your new chapter when it comes out, eh? Not a hardship for me because I’m really enjoying your writing. Not all stories have to start out with explosive action and usually the better ones are the stories that take time to introduce a character first.

You’re doing quite well on the description. You’re not spending too much time on the nitty gritty (i.e. the walls were stone with hints of red as she walked at a quarter-time towards the Great Hall, a walk that would take 2.4 minutes) but enough that I know what she’s doing but more to the point, what time of person Marianna is. As I’ve mentioned above, you’ve given a distinct impression of her character that’s just a bit uptight and I’m hoping you’re going to develop her into something a little more.

Look me up for another review when Chapter 2 is out! (Or I may just have enough time to stop by and check it out.)

Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing- I'm so glad that you enjoy my work.

Haha- you've described Marianna perfectly! Poor Marianna isn't exactly handling her best friend's departure well... It's great to hear that her feelings are coming across nicely!

I had a lot of fun writing Marianna- she is the typical Ravenclaw, so concerned with her studies that it's funny for anyone listening to her. I'm a little bit like her in terms of schoolwork (though not as extreme) and so it was remarkably easy to write her feelings.

I'll definitely request again for chapter 2- I really enjoy reading your reviews! Thanks once again!


Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 576
Submit Report: