Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:javct says:
Javct45 here with your review!

Wow, what a start to a story; I really liked it :D I think this is the first non-cliche'd (well, so far) Sirus/OC that i've read :)

The style of the story is good so far. I loved the imagery that you used, I could really imagine everything that was happening and you also portrayed Eleanor's confusion and emotions really well.

There was one thing that confused me a little (it may just be really obvious and i'm missing it cause I'm so tired haha) but at the start of the chapter you say that she is boarding the Hogwarts Express and then the next thing we know she is killing someone. Is it a memory? Or is she killing him on the Express? (I highly doubt that haha).

However, I like this is going. Can't wait to read chapter two!
*Jaz, 9/10

Author's Response: Hi, thank you so much for your comments! I almost died a little inside when i read your comment about the Sirius/OC non-cliche. I'm so pleased because that is exactly what i'm trying to go for is to explore a relationship between them that isn't cliche. I'm so pleased you feel like it isn't so far, it's only the first chapter though, but it is something i'm working really hard on. I feel like if Sirius was to fall in love at all, it would have been accidently or maybe he wouldn't even have realized he was. I'm hoping it stays far from being cliche because there is way too many out there that are :D

About the train, gosh, you're the second person to mention confusion on that part. I'm going to have to go back and reword that a bit. It's just a memory not her actually killing on the train. It's like when you're about to change your life you look back and see how you've come to this point. This is a theme of this whole story, the idea of how we become who we are.

Thanks again for all your lovely comments and thanks for taking the time to review ;D


Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 124
Submit Report: