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Review:academica says:
Hey again!

Your opening monologue about families was really interesting. It's true, even the most seemingly perfect families have their ups and downs, and often the ones that look totally untainted from the outside can be the most messed up on the inside. The monologue did a good job of setting up this piece.

I like how you described Arthur as having survived the first war only to watch his family finally see a loss in the second. This line, in particular, really pulled at my heartstrings: "The guilt settled deep in his stomach and worried its way through the all the bones in his body." You did a great job of showing us just how devastating Fred's loss was to the family. I also liked the contrast between the wand and Fred's cold, dead body and the warmth of Molly. Family is clearly more helpful to Arthur than magic in this moment.

The end of this chapter was really powerful as well. I can tell that you worked hard to use imagery to show the reader just how much the family had been affected by the war, what with the clattering dishes and contrasting busy-ness and silence. This chapter has set the stage for a very emotional tale.

Nice work! Moving on to the next one :)

academica

Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad that you liked the opening- it took a lot of effort to get it right. I did intend for it to have the effect you've described- to show that each family has their own problems, no matter how perfect they may seem.

I'm very glad that you found this chapter a good stage for an emotional tale, because that's what this story focuses on- how the Weasley family recovers from Fred's death. I definitely imagined Fred's death having an immense impact on their family and I'm glad that that came through in this piece.


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