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Review:MidnightBlue_x says:
Hey again!

First thing is first, If I were you, I would think about changing the spacing it your first paragraph or perhaps adding a little more description between the two changes of perspective between Marlene and Sirius otherwise it looks a little choppy. Also, the three year skip confused me slightly- you may want to somehow blend that (hope that makes sense) into the first chapter more?

I love how you have written Sirius drunk, it seems like the way I would imagine him act, so good job on that front! Marlene number two- that line made me laugh and I hope we get to learn more about Lola very soon- she intrigues me, while I hope Sirius doesn't always she her as the second version of Marlene, that always sucks. I have to admit, the 'she's only twelve' line both made me laugh but also confused me- probably because I completely suck at Maths. So, uh...how is old is Lola? And how old is Sirius? Thank you in advance for clearing those up for me!

Also, thank you for requesting and I will see you in the next chapter for my last review.

x Ely

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