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Review:dirtydeedsdonedirtcheap says:
I don't want to die. I don't want to die. I don't want to die. I don't want to die. 'I don't want to die. I don't want to die. I don't want to die. I don't want to die. I don't want to DIE. I DON'T WANT TO DIE. I DON'T WANT TO DIE!'

Holy. That scared the stuffing out of me (I'd use a stronger word but I can't in order to keep this 12+). That section right there. I could HEAR her screams. You literally just made my skin crawl and I'm home alone. Figured I'd take a break from studying and this is what I read. Now, I'm afraid to be here alone and I'm terrified of going to bed tonight. Thank you for giving me nightmares.

-_-

I'm in the same challenge and I actually have the same fear and our stories couldn't be any more different. While you really delve into this at such a deep level I did not and I'm glad I didn't because I was freaked out reading this. I don't want to imagine how you felt writing this.

I think the descriptions were on point. You really got the fear across and then some. You went the extra mile and really poked inside her brain. I could feel everything she was feeling. I could hear everything she was screaming and I could see the reactions of her family.

I think the only thing I could critique is why exactly she has this fear. Did she fall off the swing and get badly injured so that's why she started to fear death? Because that's what I got from it. Or was it because of her day dreams and then the monsters got her? Did they actually go inside of her or something? I was a little confused on that part but other than that the emotions and descriptions were there. I think this was by far one of the most riveting things I have ever read of yours. It's so different from everything else you have written I'm just blown away.

Author's Response: Oops sorry! Thinking about it, I should probably of mentioned that.. at least your nightmares would be HP themed? :P
Ooh! *scurries to read it*
- :O Yours is amazing! I was constantly like 'Not Hermione, Not hermione!' :P
I think I'll go back over it to add why she's so scared etc, I just *stupidly* assumed everyone would know.. without giving any hints (idiot moment).
Thanks so much for the review (again) :P


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