Hey, finally here for our swap!
This was a really interesting story. I really liked the beginning and how she was so interested in not just Astronomy but the stories behind the stars and constellations. I especially liked how they even seemed to speak to her, she knew them so well. I think this love of looking at the stars was an intriguing hobby to give to a minor character like Susan.
I also really enjoyed your portrayal of Hannah. I rarely ever see her in stories but when I do, I think she's sort of a lot more like Susan. Fearful. And usually rather clumsy and not so smart. I liked how in your story she was like the force of the Hufflepuffs. It seems like she was their leader and she would fight for Harry's side til the end, no exceptions. She was also very motherly and understanding though toward Susan, caring for her when she came back and fixing her tea. I also found it funny that the Hufflepuffs had beanbags instead of real chairs. That was a really interesting tidbit. Although, I did notice you called the Room of Requirement the Room of Secrets, I think you might have been confusing it with the Chamber of Secrets, and so I thought I'd point that out to you.
I did like the ending though. Although I wish more had happened. I enjoyed her battle cry although it was probably her downfall. She would have had a much better advantage remaining quiet and sneaking up on the Carrows than shouting as she ran toward them. And I enjoyed Ernie's comment, because he clearly saw this immediately and knew what would happen. But I was kind of hoping the other Hufflepuffs would come running and show the Carrows whose boss. Oh well.
Anyway, I did really enjoy this, even though I wished there was more. You did a really good job on this story!
Author's Response: Hello, thank you for stopping by!
I'm glad you appreciated the whole astronomy hobby, i've never really saw that in stories and as i was trying to has Susan out i just started seeing her as this whimsical woman who was more interested in words and stories because of the life she lived (most of her family being murdered and the absent father). She throws herself into a imaginary world to escape the real one because it frightens her.
About Hannah, i don't really understand those characteristics. I suppose mostly because, in the end, she marries Neville. What brought them together? Her timidness? Hardly. Hufflepuffs are hardy people, they have a lot of fight in them but also a huge caring side. I'm glad that came across.
Hehehe, i know it's the Room of Requirement. I wouldn't write that in a note, if it got intercepted and the spell figured out smart students wouldn't write the 'room of requirement', seems too obvious, to me anyway. And, in my head, i remembered that Draco was using the room of hidden things. I think the place transforms into whatever room that the group needs, so i was tranforming it into what the DA needed. A room of secrets, a place where they can hide, plan, and attack. That was my logic though. Might have been a bad word choice, i will think about it :D
I'm sorry you the ending wasn't exactly what you were looking for, i was just trying to portray the the simple change of a character. I felt like putting in more action, like the other Hufflepuff's randomly coming to that spot when she needed them, would convulate the whole idea. I wanted it to focus more on Susan's change rather than the action packed war. I hope that makes sense though :D
Thank you so much for your response and thoughtful review though! :D I really appreciate your thoughts :D