Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:CambAngst says:
Interesting.

The story definitely moved along in this chapter. I think I would have liked it to be longer, given the amount of action it covered. 2000 words isn't much for 7 separate scenes within the chapter. It felt a bit rushed.

The duel was interesting, but it was over very quickly. I also got a little lost. At one point, Macario was next to her, but two sentences later she's having to fight her way across the room to him. More than any part of the chapter, this one could have benefited from some more narrative.

The character of Dunmore confuses me. Is he just a buffoon? Is he one of these tactically brilliant but socially awkward types?

The back-and-forth between Victoire and her roommate was my favorite part of the story. I thought you wrote that very well.

Author's Response: Oh dear, the duel scene... I think I might try to rewrite/revise/lengthen it, but it's really a moot point. Hopefully I'll get better at writing action/duels as the story moves along.

I wouldn't call Dunmore socially awkward - I'd say that he considers emotions and social interaction to be somewhat trivial. I guess "stony" is a better word...?

Thanks for continuing to review! :)

Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Submit Report:  





All stories remain the property of their authors and must not be copied in any form without their consent. This is an unofficial, not for profit site, and is in no way connected with J.K. Rowling, Scholastic Books or Bloomsbury Publishing or Warner Bros. It is not endorsed by any of the aforementioned parties. Rights to characters and their images is neither claimed nor implied. The use of photographs and/or the likeness of any person contained herein does not imply endorsement of any kind. Any depictions were obtained through publically available sources and therefore fall under fair use. Although we may provide links to other websites, we are not responsible for any material at these sites. You acknowledge that you link to these other websites at your own risk. All original administrative content is copyright of the site owner and must not be copied in any form (electronic or otherwise) without the prior consent of the siteowner. ©2000-2012 Fanfictionworld.net

[terms of service] [report abuse] [privacy policy] [site credits]
 
 

navigation

home

search HPFF
read stories
write stories
login/register
get help
site links
forums
podcasts
Terms of Service
Site Rules
contact us

  
 
 

categories & genres

Genre:
- crossover
- drama
- fluff
- general
- horror/dark
- humor
- mystery
- romance
- action/adventure
- angst
- au
- young adult

Popular Pairings:
- harry/ginny
- ron/hermione
- james/lily
- draco/hermione
- more...

Format:
- one-shot
- short story
- novella
- novel
- short story collection
- songfic

  
 
 

quick links

my account
ToS
random story
site rules
help
merchandise


  
 
 

fanfictionworld.net