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Review:Bobby Dazzler says:
Howdy, leaving another review for the blue/bronze battle!

This is just a general observation and in no way a reflection on your story, but I'm surprised it got validated - there's a lot of poem in this which I think you're only permitted like 3 lines of a poem or quoted text or something to that effect, as stated in the ToS. How did you get it approved???

In regards to the formating, just a quick note, there is a lot of unnecessary blank lines between the text blocks. I'd suggest revisiting that just so your story reads easier without as much scrolling, because as it is it looks abit messy and is slightly distracting.

I love Luna, I think you did a nice job capturing her inner demons and the fact she's alone and misses her dad, that was sweet and sad. I understand that it's a glimpse into her mindset and not as much description is required I suppose, but it does rely heavily on the poem to move forward which is slightly unfortunate. I would've liked a bit more depth to support the story on its own, rather than based on the influence of a poem, but it was still enjoyable. :)

Author's Response: Thanks for your feedback! In this challenge, the point of the story was to have the poem as the main focus of the story, describing how the poem relates to the character, if that makes sense, or that's how I interpreted it anyway, and I quite like it this way! I'm going to do something about the formatting though, people keep saying about that. As for the validating, nothing seemed to come up about the number of lines, I don't know how that worked!

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