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Review:AC_rules says:
I love the Sirius and Regulus dynamic too! I have two one shots planned for the opposite moods challenge about them!

Well I think you did a fantastic job with them. All the way through you had pretty short paragraphs, which isn't a bad thing at all, but it sort of gave it an almost poetic feel which I really liked. Although I've got to say that I think your flow worked better with some of your other stuff - Everbloom and any other world, but it was still pretty darn good all the same.

I didn't think you went overboard with metaphors at all! Got to love metaphors and yours worked really well, I though.

The idea that sirius remained a prince was just perfect, something I've always thought, and actualy I loved the bit when you focused on their parents lost without an heir. I've actually never thought much about how it must have felt for them when there sons were gone - one dead, one in prison and actually, that must have hurt. They can't have been so unfeeling as not to care at all, can then?

One thing:

"...and sometimes it fell down upon him around his ear"

^I just think there's probably a better way of wording that because its just a little off. But thats me really nitpicking so I can try and come up with something constructive to say.

An excellent one shot that I really enjoyed reading and reviewing :)

-AC

Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review! :) I'll definitely make sure to check out your one shots with them once they're posted - I do love these characters!

Glad it flowed all right. I have to be honest and say that Everbloom was much easier to write, so that might have showed a bit :)

I always have thought of Sirius as a prince in his own way, and it was something I sort of wanted to explore here. And yes, I agree - they might have been awful, but they weren't Voldemort. They must have had some feelings, wouldn't they? To lose both your children must be pretty awful.

Thank you for pointing that out! I'm planning on going back and editing this later (well, after November, most likely) to try to fix some of the more awkward sentences, so I'm on the lookout for them!

Thank you so much for your review! ♥


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