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Review:dobbys_socks says:
Alright, I've decided to do 2 chapters at a time to make it easier for you and me.

I'm a bit confused about this Wendy character. You haven't said why she moved to London and I thought it quite odd that she didn't bring any clothes, but that's your decision.

I think you wrote Lily and James really well and they are exactly what they're like in the books, so good job. Sirius and Remus still aren't portayed correctly but I jut havea habit of pointing thse things out.

There was a few grammatical errors; in the beginning of London Calling you could have fixed the grammar and one sentence you used "very long" twice, I think it was in Wendy's letter. Just watch your spelling, too.

So, these two chapters were better and I liked London Calling more. Does the old lady from the plane come back in it somehow?

Well done, again.

G

Author's Response: Wendy is a bit odd. I think I'm doing my job there. I think my reasoning was she couldn't afford to have the records, the guitar and her clothes. Something had to give.

I guess I'm trying to show Remus and Sirius on their way to becoming who they are, if that makes any sense. Lily and James are stopped about a year from now - frozen until Harry encounters them. But Remus and Sirius have fourteen years before Harry meets them and we learn who they are. I was trying to show them as they might have been.

I will address those issues with grammar.

Thank you for your thoughts. I really do appreciate seeing how what I've written seems to the reader.


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