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Review:electricfeel says:
Hi, electricfeel here from the forums with your review.

Your writing is very good, it all flows well and is easy to get lost in. The characterisation is strong and realistic. I really like how you've jumped from day 368 to day 1, that's an interesting technique that I think will work very well.

The plot does seem great, however, I think you may have introduced too many layers all at once. The first chapter and second chapter seem to be completely unrelated. Some characters have been completely altered or even deleted. Although, all of this could lead to an extremely interesting and unique story, I think it needs to slow down a little. I read from your other replies to reviews that you like to confuse the reader. That's understandable, we all want the reader to be so intrigued and confused by a storyline that they just HAVE to read the next chapter. However, by adding too many layers I think some readers may find it too complicated and it can actually be off-putting. That's just my opinion, however, and maybe chapter three will make everything a little clearer and I'll take back what I've said here :)

I did like how many regions of the castle were wrote about; the lake, the common rooms and especially the portraits. That was a great touch. I really do think this has the potential to be a very strong story with an interesting and intelligent plot.

Anyway, I hope this review helped in some way :)

Author's Response: Hello ^_^ I'm glad you took the time to come back and read this again for me ^_^

:O Really :) I like you, your welcome back anytime you want :) *Hands cookies* I always wanted to do a backwards story, as that is what I call them, where the start is so forward that the story needs to go back for a reader to understand everything. I like reading stories like that so I thought I would try one.

The Layer I find too be a bit of an issue as well, while I was re-reading I kind of noticed a little of what you where talking about, but the majority of the confusion will be all better in the next chapter as A Lot more is revealed and you understand the new world that the Hogwarts students are living in, so Some of what you said will have to be taken back :P lol . xxx

The regions of the castle were a struggle, I'm not gonna lile. The Portraits where hard as was the scene with Fred - Poor Bugger - it was all so hard that I was really nervous about posting it ^_^ But i'm glad you liked it :)

Thank you soo soo much, and you are always a big help ^_^ xx

~Karni. xx


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