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Review:electricfeel says:
Hi electricfeel from the forums here with your review. I'm so sorry for the wait, my internet broke for a while there, but I'm finally back online. YAY!

I think my favourite thing about this is how well it fits into canon. It's quite cleverly done and it makes it easier to understand Narcissa's pain and worry. I also like Persephone, I feel like we saw two sides to her, the side that takes charge and is strong, like when she shouts at the Healer, or when she speaks to Narcissa. But we also see her softer, more submissive side when she speaks to Healer Turov. It's an interesting combination.

I'm also really interested to see how working at Hogwarts will turn out. I imagine it would be an interesting job anyway, but I'm left wondering how it will tie into the plot with the Malfoys (that's if it even does!).

Overall, it was a good opening chapter, but, I felt like it wasn't amazing. I feel like there was a little something missing. Your grammar was all fine and you did leave it on a cliffhanger. But I think because we know what happens next with Snape, it doesn't seem all that surprising. I do think, however, that most readers would give it a chance, because your writing is quite good and it is an interesting premise.

Anyways, I did enjoy it and I hope my review was helpful :)

Author's Response: Hello!! Thank you for writing such an encompassing review. It's been ridiculously helpful and I plan on making changes right away.

Thank you, I'm glad you like Persephone. I was afraid I had fallen into the cliche of making a "perfect" OC.

Oh, you'll get to see how it all ties together! =]

Hmm, I hadn't thought about that. I was focusing so much on the romance of the story I hadn't even considered how dull it might be because I stick so close to the cannon. I will try to spice things up a bit. Thank you for the tip!

Your review was very helpful!! Thank you so much!!


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