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Review:academica says:
Hey there! Here with your requested review :)

I love the concept of this story, and I really love the character of Caradoc. You painted a very interesting picture of him right from the get-go, and I love the little details you added about his office, the secretary and his journey to and from the meeting. Imagery is one of my big things, and you really impressed me in this piece. It definitely has a dark feel to it, and I think you executed the bleakness of the times quite well.

I think you did equally well characterizing the more familiar faces in this story, and I especially have to commend you on your treatment of Lily. She's portrayed in an unusually rosy light all too often, and I love her, but I'm glad to see someone judging and attacking her a little bit. That's an incredibly unique feature, and it adds even more depth to Caradoc. I also appreciate you making James, Sirius and Remus sound like different people, which can sometimes be hard to find; I do hope, however, that you'll pay Peter a bit more attention in future chapters, since he tends to get left out a lot.

The whole thing flowed very well and definitely kept my attention. I was so interested by it, in fact, that I'm going to add it to my favorites list in the hope of keeping up with it as the story progresses. I didn't see any grammar, spelling and punctuation errors either, which is wonderful.

Thanks so much for requesting a review! It was a pleasure to read this, and I hope that my comments are helpful to you :)

academica

Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad you like Caradoc - there was so much freedom with him (as in, everything) so I was a little worried as to how he would actually turn out. The bleakness and darkness is something that will undoubtedly continue to worry me, but hopefully it'll stay the same at least.
Thanks for your comments on Lily, James, Sirius and Remus - they'll be turning up again later, so it's a relief to see that you like the way I've showed them. I tried to show how Lily's compassion and worry can also be a weakness, rather than a strength as most people portray it. It seemed more fitting, given the times. At the moment I'm planning the rest of the story and Peter will definitely be turning up again, don't worry!
Thank you so much for all your lovely comments - they were all helpful (in fact, I think one or two of them sparked a plunny...)

Aph xx


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