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Review:Atomic says:
Hey there!

I loved the dialogue in this chapter!! You're great at making things both believable and funny at the same time. Most people really overdo the humor and make it seem very calculated. Not you though!! I absolutely love Padma and Alicia. They're hilarious

The flow in this chapter was a broken up, because all the girls were doing different things. I might try to tie their lives in more, more starting with Cho at work, and then have her visit Hannah. Finishing up with Padma and Alicia venting to the other two about their days at work later that evening. I totally understand that you want to show them all interacting with other people and at their own jobs, but it really makes it feel like four different short chapters.

Characterization was absolutely lovely in this chapter, though!! Even though it broke up the flow, this chapter really gave us a feel for each of the four girls and their daily lives. I really liked how we got to see each of them in their daily environments.

Great chapter, once again! Moving onto the next one now!

Author's Response: Hi there!

Thank you again :)

The flow was kind of broken up, wasn't it? I didn't know how else to work with it, since if I had Cho going and visiting everyone, it wouldn't show their sides of the story as much. Cho's still the main character, but I wanted everyone to have their own storylines.

Thank you so much for reading, Atomic!


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