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Review:academica says:
Here I am with your review! (Brownie points indeed!!)

This was a good second chapter. I thought the action flowed pretty well, and it was fairly easy to follow what was going on even with the abrupt change in scenes. I thought Andromeda's letters were really touching and seem to fit well with what we know of her character. I also liked the scene at the command center; it was neat to watch familiar characters stepping up to help out in this very bleak situation.

Andromeda's second letter was a little confusing. "I wish for me to know..." -- did you mean something like, "it would comfort me to know" or did you mean to replace me with something else? I saw some missing commas and grammar errors here also, so I would recommend that you look into getting a beta from the forums. They're all very nice :)

Still a very interesting story. I like that your chapters are short because it's easy to read through them, but at the same time, they might benefit from you adding some additional imagery and/or filling out the dialogue a little bit. Just an idea :) Thanks for the request, and as always, I hope my comments are helpful!

academica

Author's Response: Phew that's a relief! I'm glad it flowed! I figured that the wizards and witches in the command center were all important characters in the Wizarding World. All the Weasleys would be treated with respect now, because of their seniority in fighting against Death Eaters.

Hm... I think I'll change that part too to clear it up, but your interpretation is correct. You're right. I should definitely get a beta to help me fight bad grammar!

I try to keep all of my chapters above 1000 words, but that's my only guideline usually. More detail is always helpful! :D

And your comments were very helpful - thanks!



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