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Review:academica says:
Hey! Here with your review :)

I liked how you described the advantages and disadvantages of being unnoticed; that was kind of a cool take on something that people normally just view in a negative light. However, when you got to where you were talking about how Slytherins aren't usually unnoticed, it started to sound a little repetitive. You also had a tendency to over-explain yourself later on, like when Tracey said to McGonagall that she took the material from the book and put it in quotes, and then she said it again in an inner dialogue later. I'm just not sure it was necessary.

I was also a little unsure about your characterization of Millicent; even as a Slytherin, I imagine she would be the object of teasing and probably too shy to address the Headmaster in such a rude tone. In addition, I found Dumbledore's punishment to be a little harsh -- detention, failing the class, and the possibility of expulsion? I probably would have stopped at failing Transfiguration, personally. I also found the slap a little overdramatic, especially for someone who usually sort of keeps to herself. I felt similarly about Millicent's response. I just think it got a bit carried away.

I know this sounds like a really harsh review, but I wanted to offer you my honest feedback. I really did enjoy reading about a couple of Slytherins who aren't really fleshed out at all in canon, and I liked Theo's characterization a lot. I also love that you included an unconventional pairing, as I like reviewing those as much as I can. In addition, I didn't notice any glaring technical mistakes, which is always a good thing.

Thanks for requesting a review, and I hope my comments are helpful to you :)

academica (Slytherin)

Author's Response: Yea i think i did get a little carried away with some of the stuff but at the same cheating is something really huge here so i figured why not have it just as big there. Thank you so much for your review if I ever go back and edit it i will keep your advice i mind. Thank you very much!

~Slytherinchica08~


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