Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:ravenclaw_princess says:
Great chapter once again. I like Jaycee. She doesn't seem as fanatical as Fiona in terms of acting out her fandom and it seems like she is more worried about her social status than anything else. I'm really happy she followed Addison in the end, even if she did hesitate at first. It shows that in the end of the day, her friends are more important than boys.

I think you have done a great job of Fiona. She really captures everything you can imagine in a crazy stalkerish fan.

I would recommend you add a little more depth to Jaycee in the coming chapters. Her love of James is quite obvious, but it would be nice to know about other aspects of her life as well just to make her a more rounded character that has interests other than James.

The story flows really well though and has a nice pace. Your dialogue is also well done. I've enjoyed reading this story so far and your characters are believable. If you would like me to review any further chapter, repost in my thread.

Author's Response: Thanks! :)

No, she isn't as fanatical as Fiona, but Fiona has suffered a huge loss (James' loss, actually), so I think being a little insane is okay for her personality :P

And, uh...Jaycee didn't go afer Addison when she mentioned her 'best friend'. I know, I know, you hate me now. But it had to be done. I know the ending is a little obscure, but things will be plenty clearer in the next chapter.

Depth is something that my characters acquire slowly. soo, Jaycee's personality would be revealed a lot more in the next chapter, promise!

Thanks! :D Glad you found it believable. I'd be sure to ask you again when I need the help!
Thanks again! :)


Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 757
Submit Report: