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Review:ANP says:
Hi there!

Again terrific writing! You scene setting is phenomenal, language is refreshing and very descriptive. You imagination is wonderful and this is very intriguing. I also want to say that you have a very good grasp over suspense and mystery and I can tell you've planned this out very well and have put a lot of effort and research into this story.

I love the chapter tittle.. it gives insight to the Englishman and also connects this chapter to the next one.. You have me and I'm sure other readers guessing who he might be. Is he the murderer? Is he a character we know from the books or a deatheater you've created? I feel that this prologue offers further insight into the depth of this story. It's not just your regular serial killer(if there is such a thing) and it offers a foreshadowing of the adventure Audrey and Percy are going on.

I really only have one suggestion.. when the Indian owner says 'You can't wake up' I think you should include 'her'.. I realize that you were trying to portray poor english, but it's just a little too confusing.

I'll be on the look out for further chapters.. you've captured my interest!

Miss Chris

Author's Response: Yay! I love reading mysteries, and I really think you write what you read (I've tried to write comedy...epic fail, truly epic). As for research, wikipedia definitely helped out, but I also have a little background in Hinduism via university. Glad that came through!

The title is part of the mystery! So I won't comment on that aspect, but I like it too. I recently realized that I have a tendency to pick my favorite line from a chapter and make that a title, but it's worked so far. The murderer in question is definitely not "regular" (though as you say, what IS a "regular" serial murderer?).

I'll definitely make the change you suggested--it can be tough to tell if something is difficult to understand when you're the author, so I really appreciate it.

Yay for reading more chapters! I hope to have the next one up soon, I'm stuck on one tiny scene, but I'm hoping for next week.

xoxo wenderbender


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