Oh. My. GOODYGOSHNESS!
That chapter was pretty flipping AMAZING SAUCE!
(don't you just love all my non-words today?)
So, my super-dee-duperdee long review today. ^.^ So here goes...
So, beginning at the beginning, it seems that Sirius is scared Kylie may leave him, even though it was confirmed nothing would happen with the chapter. I think this is because it's like he held her hand super tight when they entered the Great Hall the day after they got back together. It may be that he's like thinking she's too good to be true, that she's almost like a mirage. I think that was pretty cool. That he finds her that amazing. It's obvious she thinks the same of Sirius, though not in the same sense. She was frightened what others may think, and was frightened of what Sirius might do when faced with her friends again.
On the topic of Bryson, which I neglected to talk about last chapter, I think we're in the same position here as Matt is with Jaz. I think this one is going to be the exact same thing. Because if you go back to the Ouija Board chapter, it tells you that Sirius will have he baby, but they won't ever get married, and that they will break up. Also, I don't think you are an author to disrupt the natural balance of everything, meaning having them be together... That never happens. I think that EVERYONE knows that Bryson has a horrible crush on Kylie. And as much as he wants Kylie to be happy (as is proven by him forcing the two of them to get back together), he really loves her and wants to be with her as well. So I think that Eventually something will happen where Sirius and Kylie break up after she gets pregnant, and Bryson will be there to pick up the pieces. I think that eventually Kylie and Bryson will get married. But those are just my thoughts. Though as it stands now, you know Bryson has a huge crush on Kylie and doesn't want to let her go. So you know this, and then you can also tell that he won't let anything bad happen to her, or he will protect her. As was proven last chapter again.
Then, on to something else - THE MATCH! Those Camels were VICIOUS! Though that one guy was really twitchy... I thought you had taken my idea and had the curse or whatever on the feather that he gave her... but apparently not... ): But I'll live. Gosh, this game they fought tooth and nail to win. But what I don't get is that you said in there that the Hogwarts team was seamless, that they were amazing. Then why were they loosing? Was it JUST their speed because the Camels were so fast or no? And that dirty trick - I want to know what happens to that captain. Did he become permanently injured? Or will he make a full recovery? I hope he'll make a full recovery, but if he doesn't, then Kylie will be crushed with knowing that SHE DID THAT to a person. I don't think she'd be able to handle that type of guilt.
Then on to another topic, you had a very good atmosphere this chapter. You used calming words that are meant to soother a person. Like even in there you said that for the first time in a long time Kylie felt at ease and peaceful. So that's good. It means that things are slightly calming down from last chapter. It also means that it presents more opportunity for more drama. YAY! ^.^
OH! Talking about drama. BRYSON. What was he up to before the game? Like was he trying to actually kill himself or no? Was he cutting his neck? Was he trying to hang himself? Was he trying to impale himself? I know James didn't do that, because if James had done that, everyone would have seen blood on James' hands, and then also, if James did it, Bryson would have willingly told Kylie, and not tried to cover it up and say it was nothing. I think it falls into his whole "I'll tell you after the competition." category. It may very well have had something to do with how he didn't want Kylie to know his feelings, or how he thought she might turn against him.
*takes a deep breath and lets it all out* SO! Now that my Super-dee-duperdee long review is done, remember to reply please and thank you!
PS (that was WAY LONGER than what I expected. Hope you don't mind... *blushes*)
Author's Response: Thanks for the amazing, amazing, AMAZING long review that made my heart about stop in pure joy when I saw it sitting here!
Sirius and Kylie, though completely disfunctional at times, really love each other with the kind of depth that they don't understand. They spent six years HATING each other, which kind of... deepened the emotional well they had concerning each other; I mean, hate is a really powerful emotion, and when you have it for that long it leaves some pretty big holes. So when they finally fell in love, the depth of their hate immeaditely switched into a more positive emotion. That, and the fact that they disliked each other for so long is an excellant contrast. They know what it's like to hate each other and what it's like to love each other, so they don't want to fall back in to their old ways.
I really wish I could comment long and hard about your paragraph (because there's nothing else to call it - it's so great!) regarding Bryson - but I can't. Not until the next chapter comes out, at which point you wil probably have OOODLES to say about it - but until then, just know that I loved reading about your take on what could come and what Bryson feels!
Don't worry honey - there are still lots of matches for twitchy players, right? The Camels were REDICULIOUSLY fast - and when Kylie removed herself from the game to try and pull her dirty move, that's one less person protecting your teammates. And it doesn't do much good when you have the quaffle and you get smacked around by some guy with a bat. If the guy doesn't recover, then yes, Kylie will have to deal with that guilt - and as you've noticed, guilt isn't something she does very well with. She's usually such a good, moral person, that she has trouble with her inner deamons a lot more than anyone thinks.
Kylie has trouble with relaxation almost as much as she has trouble with stress; between the drama with Sirius, preparing for the match, the Jaz-Remus-Matt love triangle, and fighting her own nightmarish past, she doesn't get a chance to breathe very often. So I thought it was finally time to give her a minute of peace - yeah?
Again, I can't tell you exactly what happened to Bryson's neck until the NEXT chapter. You're right when you say that it wasn't James - no blood, not willing to speak, as you said. It does fall into that catagory - you're perfectly spot on!
All right, I'm just going to give you an amazingly huge ammount of thanks for how beautiful and long this review was! It was absolutely amazing and completely made my week! You're epic! Thank you again so so so so so so so so so so so so so MUCH!