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Review:LovelyMioneWeasley says:
Hi there, this chapter was definitely more frustrating for me than the last one. And not because of lack of anything but because as the author you convinced me of the story and the characters enough that I got into it and reacted to the situations.

First off, here's an example of what kind of typos/issues I'm seeing as far as grammar and mechanics and such go. Can you believe forth years nearly over? Jan asked.-- It should be Fourth asin the number and there needs to be an apostrophe before the 's' in years. It's small things but it definitely disrupts the flow for me. I would reccommend checking out the forums for a beta maybe or just asking a close friend to read over it to see if they catch anything you miss.

Now, onto characters--Al and James both definitely pissed me off in this chapter. First off, James was so beyond selfish for me and his careless attitude is frustrating. I'm not quite sure how well that would tolerated by Harry and Ginny. I can't be sure that I can really envision something like that happening. Albus comes off a bit wimpy to me at times, and his insistance to not forewarn about the red ball certainly made a difference.

I loved Jan and the bit of humor in the Hopsital Wing scene. I think that it was quite original to get rid of all the hair and such; I was certainly impressed with that bit.

On to the last chapter!


Author's Response: Is the frustration a good thing though? Hmmm. :P

Grammar wise I'll go back over and edit again. Maybe I'll think about getting a beta too, as I know I always miss things like that ^

In my head James wouldn't dare behave how he does infront of Harry and Ginny and instead confines it to Hogwarts time... I'll try and make that clear :)

Thanks for the second lovely review :)

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