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Review:justonemorefic says:
Hee I'm quite charmed by the conversation about apparition~

Woops, double negativing! "Alyssa had never ever not got what she wanted" Might want to fix that to something clearer.

I think Alyssa's background is a tad cliche. A bit too plastered-on, like it's trying to explain the most important parts of her with something that happened so long ago; I don't really buy it. I think there should be more complicated reasons why she's like that, or at least explained in a way that seems a little more realistic.

I really like though, how Lauren is insecure and how Holden is really just genuinely curious. I can understand why both of them are the way they are, and there's really not a right or wrong path to choose, except to hope that they understand each other's reasons and work out something.

Author's Response: Oops, I really need to have another look at this story and fix all these weirdly worded statements that you're finding and bringing to my attention. *hides* And I'll definitely have to figure out a way to add more insight to Alyssa to make it seem less cliche. But I'm glad there are still parts of it you're enjoying and thanks again for reviewing! (:

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