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Review:LovelyMioneWeasley says:
Hi there, LMW from the forums with your requested review.

First off, I just wanted to say thank you for requesting a review. It is always my pleasure to be able to read more stories and be able to give my own opinion on different writing and on different stories that clearly take place.

Okay, so first off, I'm a bit confused by the whole chapter itself and how the flow works for this chapter. It seems like there should have been breaks in how segregated the different sections of the chapter. It seems to kind of crash into different spots and it was like I was reading a new whole spot of the story.

Sirius, for the most part, seems like he is in character--being with James, hating his family, getting all stirred up about his mother being there, offering Snape the opportunity to make a fool of himself, and he getting upset. I am also curious about the Professor and why the professor felt the need to pick out Sirius to try to help.

I'm curious to know how Regulus will fit into the entire story. I also think that overall you did a good job with this chapter other than flow. I would reccommend working on that.


Author's Response: Thank you for your review. Regulus will be in the story later, though he won't be a huge part.

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