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Review:justonemorefic says:
And the plot arrives! I always personally loved masquerades, even though they can sometimes be cliche. I like how there wasn't a too big of an emphasis on it, just a chance encounter. I think that helps set it apart from other masquerade type stories, where people dance with someone and then fall in love.

Hehe, James is all pestery. Er, I mean -- proactive! ;D Oh the ones in relationships always want to play matchmaker.

I think moving the plot along definitely helped bring in more interest. The mystery is set! The girl is quite interesting (who doesn't like a little bite?). For now I'll just say to also take care that your dialogue isn't too stiff. Talking in full sentences is sometimes kind of odd and adding too many dialogue tags also makes it seem slow sometimes.

Now lets see how this mystery will pan out! :D

Author's Response: You have no idea how happy that makes me that you find this story more original than other masquerade stories because I was trying to make it different. I always try to stay away from cliches, but if I have to write one then I want to write it my own way that is different than how others have written it.

Yes, I quite like writing James, he's very fun to write. The first story is mainly in his perspective, altering at times to Marisol, and I had fun playing around with him. He is quite the character.

Hmmm, I definitely agree about dialogue being too stiff, and can say that it has vastly improved in later chapters and my other stories that came after this one. I mean, I still struggle with dialogue, but now I feel I can write it a bit more natural than I used to. I just haven't had the chance to go back through and edit the dialogue (because I'm lazy). However, some day I may very well decide to go back and revise the earlier chapters of this story.

Anyway, I'm glad you find the plot to be picking up and are enjoying it. Thanks again, Gina! (:


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