It's Katie/JaneTwilight from the forums here with your well-deserved SOTM reviews. I'm really sorry that it took me so long to get to you. I haven't had a decent enough length of time to spare in which I could sit down and read and review your work (I always take half an hour to write just one review) and I've been so busy on the forums with other responisbilities that it's just been impossible to get here. Whilst scrolling along your author's page, I spotted this particular story which consists of my favourite ship of all time! Even more so, I absolutely love the Next Generation era (very rarely read anything else on the archives). Anyway, enough with the rambling. On with the review!
The good news is, this was FANTASTIC! And the bad news is - I couldn't fault this chapter (bad for me anyway, because I'm usually quick to pick up on any poor points apparent in a person's work - you've made me doubt my ability lol).
In all honesty, I don't think I've read a story so refreshingly well-written in a long time. When reading your work in the past, I've tended to notice that you have a delightfully unique writing style. Your colourful and vivid use of description is almost poetic and definitely something that I am in awe of. I wish that I had the talent and ability
to comprise my own writing with so many metaphors, similes, beautiful cases of imagery and personifications that flow with the writing as effortless as yours do. This is the main reason why I nominated your story 'Dominique' for the SOTM's best written - it just stood out to me - not only amongst all of the other 'claw stories that I have read in the past, but also amongst every story that I've ever read on the archives (either I have a knack for stumbling across stories with extremely bad authors, or otherwise you are an exceptionally talented writer!)
I happen to be very fond of your portrayal of Teddy in this piece. Usually, when I've come across his character in other stories people tend to depict him as this golden replica of his father; sweet. brave and mature for his age. It's very rare that I have ever witnessed an author focus more on his animalistic traits that come with him being part-werewolf than the traits he has happened to inherit from Remus. I have to thank you for that - it's always such a refreshing experience to see people approaching characters from much more original and realistic angles.
Apart from the above, I don't really see any more aspects of this chapter that I could comment on. What with it being a prologue of sorts, everything at the moment seems to be rather quiet and ambiguous. All I can say is that I thoroughly enjoyed reading this; it was a truly flawless piece of work.
- Katie -
Author's Response: Hi Katie!
No worries about it. We all get very busy, obviously, and that's why I have taken so long to respond to these lovely, lovely reviews. Sorry. Poor effort by me. Thanks for taking the time to do this - I really love 'Victory' because it's different to anything I've ever done, so I'd love some feedback. I had massive qualms about posting it, actually, because TedVic is such a -fluffy- ship. Victoire is always pregnant or in some unrequited love thing with Teddy, but what she does not know is that he loves her back. There's sunshine and unicorns and everyone is happy. This is different. Yeah, it's TedVic, but it's very dark and Teddy's a hunter and Victoire's a crazy pray. Thank you so much for your lovely comments! They give me so much confidence and make my blush and everything. And I'm sure your ability to give constructive criticism is not diminished. :P
Like I said before, this story is completely different to anything I have ever done. It's more poetic - it is so ambiguous. Sorry about that! I love ambiguity, so I thought I'd go a bit mental with it. No names. No nothing. Just excess amounts of flowery language and annoyingly pretentious choppy sentences and Roman numerals and repeated, italicised sections. Heh, apparently you like it. You mention 'Dominique' - a murder mystery that is very heavily focused on plot. Usually I focus more on the plot and, even though I think it's important that the story is well written, writing style usually takes second place. I wanted to try something different. In this story, the plot and writing are so closely interwoven, because I wanted to make Teddy's narration as realistic as possible. It's a lot short, choppy sentences because the rhythm flows wells with the way he's running, and he's obvo thinking of Victoire, so there's some flashbacks/memories thrown in as well.
Victoire is a bit crazaaay. She's obsessed with her own and other's immortality - hence the obsession with killing herself and others. She thinks she is an angel. She looks like one, Teddy treats her like one. She obviously doesn't fit anywhere on earth. And yes, I love writing in second person - it's so hard with the tenses and the feel, but it's great fun.They are both monsters. Victoire has Veela blood in her, as well as her father having some werewolf symptoms. In short, they are both monsters. His is more instinctive - the werewolf cannot control his own actions like when he is in his human form - whereas Victoire is much more a praying mantis/black widow sort of a girl. Vicious, manipulative. A cow. I think that's why they clung to each other, in a way.
Thanks for the wonderful review!