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Review:Mintleaf says:
Hello! Finally here with your other requested review :)

'...and I aint sure till when can I keep the fake smile...' - I have to say I do not like the use of the word aint here. Your writing seems so formal and mature, and that just seems to dumb it down a little!

'I, Rose Serena Weasley is in love...' - 'am in love'.

'give him place' - 'give him a place'.

'his innocent round face...' - 'innocent, round face'. This one is more of a general note to watch out for commas here and there. They're often so tricky to place! :)

'“Don’t Mention…”' - "Don't Mention it..." ?

Did you purposely change all the names? Particularly the spelling of Scorp's name... I'm a little confused on that front.

I find it EXTREMELY bizarre that they introduced themselves with their middle names here, '“So, I am Rose Serena Weasley…you can call me Rose.”

“Cool…I am Scorpious Lavorghe Malfoy…though I would prefer to be called just Scorpious or Scorp.”' - I've never seen anyone do that, ever haha.

'avoides me in whichever way possible' - 'avoids'.

It might be nice to leave a bigger space between the flashback and what is happening now, just to ease the flow.

You've written Al really well, especially his dialogue.

While I do think the plot is a bit too sudden for my liking, I do see the appeal. Poor Lily, though haha.

Author's Response: hey!

thanks a lot for your review!

Well, actually I had given the story to a beta and now it has been proof-read and edited and just waiting for validation, so whatever mistakes you pointed are already corrected =P =D

I'm glad you found Al written well..!

thanks a lot for your review!!!


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