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Review:puiwaihin says:
I liked the first few paragraphs (in terms of the challenge). You had some really good badly written lines there. After that the writing stayed fairly even, which was a shame because you started out so badly-- which many of the other entries in the challenge don't really do.

The plot was bad, and you parodied the inconsistencies in bad writing well, although I thought the narrator commenting on it took away from the badness.

I think I'm getting jaded about these contest entries. :P

Good luck on the challenge!

Author's Response: I'm glad you found it sufficiently terrible :) Though I suppose I could make it worse...Thank you for pointing out the room for deprovement (pretty sure that's not a word, but it is now) and thank you for the review :D

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