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Review:Mintleaf says:
Hi again!

Grammar/Readability:
This chapter seems fine!


Characterization:
I will say though, I think they are all very polite to each other for people who pretty much live together. Not within the girls and boys but when they mix together... they're just too lovely for teenagers haha! This isn't really a big deal or anything though.

Filch's stupidity is perfect. So amusing hahaha.

Dumbledore is also excellent! Good work, he's a tricky one to write! Why isn't his password a type of sweet though?!


Plot/Flow:
This was a way better start than I was expecting! It was so James-like but not cliche either! :)

I'm worried at the announcement of the head's dorm! I'm scared of cliches. Oh so scared! Please don't disappoint me haha! :) That being said, I think the issue would be resolved if you offered some kind of explanation, because it didn't sound like this was tradition or anything. They seemed surprised which leads me to believe that it was new protocol and this would become ten times more viable if you offered some kind of explanation!

Author's Response: Thank you!

The Head Dorm thing... I was absolutely terrfied to do that! It really just works so well as a device and I'm going to try extra, extra hard not to let it become cliche in anyway... I want it to be a gathering place where they happen to live and not the scene of their torrid affairs or anything like that so hopefully I can just use it as a device and not fall into anything there!

Thank you for another so very enlightening review!

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