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Review:Aiedail says:
hi there!! saw you in the blue vs. bronze and thought that i would review one of your stories!

so i'm not usually one for song-fics because i feel that usually the story is actually the same as the one in the song--but yours works because there's not actually a concrete story in the song. i did notice a couple areas where you took ideas right from the lyrics though and had Hermione saying them; this is something that i might consider revising. if you have the lyrics in the story we can see them, and i don't know that having them again in the dialogue advances the story :)

i liked that this story didn't end the way that i thought it might; i also like that it deviated from canon. i think that Ron could realistically be weak as you portray him; and even though i would have not given Ron as much of the right things to say ("she deserves better than me anyway," and things to that effect!), i think that it's a nice story over all!
--lily :)

Author's Response: Thanks for all your comments. I'll look at revising some of the text in places to include the idea rather than the lyric itself.

I'm glad you like my portrayal of Ron. I always feel that he would give in to temptation thinking that it might be better than he already has. And in doing so, he lost the one thing that really mattered to him, and so needs to punish himself for his weakness.

I'm glad you like the story. I'll have a look at revising some things it like you said. thanks again


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