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Review:justonemorefic says:
Oooh, tackling the tough you-know-who himself. Very hard to write him, I know. I think you do a good job of imagining yourself in his shoes (metaphorical, anyhow. Can you imagine Voldy with shoes?). It's not every day you have to think like the Dark Lord.

I can see what you're trying to get across and you do a good job of explaining and describing. Some of the syntax and vocabulary could change to emphasize his thoughts. I like to think that there's a lot of power in implications rather than explaining everything. Sometimes less is better depending on the scene. Such as: "There was a moment of struggling and then he was no more" could just be "He struggled and then he was no more".

You also don't need to explicitly say the emotions. The whole showing not telling bit. Like in here: "filled me with so much hate, so much spite", a lot of this can be implied.

Good job! I hope this helped some :D Definitely props for doing a Voldy oneshot!

Author's Response: Hi!
hehe! voldemort in shoes ;)
Yes, I can see what your saying about syntax. I tend to be a bit too wordy sometimes- I'll be working on it more, thanks for pointing that out, and thanks for the wonderfully thoughtful review:)


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