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Review:LovelyMioneWeasley says:
All righty--last chapter. And it was definitely interesting to read.

As far as pacing and such goes, it was quite a jump from the first year to the fifth year. I liked that you included the O.W.L.S. was good but it was just a big jump for me personally.

Rose and Scorpius were definitely enjoyable and I really liked their fighting. Albus and James broke my heart a little bit...its so sad to see the fighting siblings.

My reccomendation outside of betas and such would be to see how you wanted to keep the flow going between dialgoue and thoughts/descriptions. At some point, the dialogue seems natural but it seems forced at other parts. You do not have to have a perfect balance between the two but just think about what seems more approriate to communicate the thought in your head.

Hope these reviews helped!

LMW

Author's Response: they all helped loads! i hope you don't mind that i reply to them all in this one. i'm dead tired lol. yeah, i have to go back and correct grammar stuff. i've been looking over my chapters as much as i can stand. i have a topic posted looking for a beta but i can't find one :/ i do have one for my next story however, which is a plus.

as for the gap, i know it's rather large... but i felt that the tricks third years would be playing on each other would be nothing new, and i wanted to establish that this feud was now on and off again thing. it's the real deal. i'm sorry if the jump was off-putting.
i struggle with dialogue a lot. as lame of an excuse as it is, i'm an only child, so most conversations take place in my head, if that makes sense without making me sound loony. anyway, it's hard for me to come up with dynamic dialogue sometimes.

thank you for the reviews :) it's refreshing to hear such good criticisms!


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