Hey! It's Liberty from my review thread on the forums!
Sorry it's taken me a bit to get around to reviewing this story...
I forgot to use a rating on the previous chapter's review, so just so you know, I meant to give it a 10/10.
Anyways, I like this chapter. It's not as eloquent as the previous, but much more eventful. That makes me feel like I can expect your story to be balanced between your plot and actual writing skills.
I love the introduction of Remus, I wasn't sure which time period you were working with and I just absolutely adore Remus.
I was a bit shell-shocked to see Hermione's name among those up there, it doesn't seem Canon, but the whole point of fanfiction is to not be Canon.
You can sort of see a little love triangle here, between Freddy, Remus, and Dr. Crane, but it's very subtle and well done, just showing some of Dr. Crane's protectiveness over Freddy.
Remus and Freddy's relationship is also very interesting. I don't think you mention why Freddy is reluctant to consider him a friend in this chapter, and if you don't, you certainly created some anticipation in the reader.
Freddy's character has definitely been developed with our glimpse of how she interacts and reacts to Remus. We definitely can see her wild child with how trapped she constantly sounds.
I'm sorry I don't have any criticism for you! This story is just splendid really...
p.s. If you liked my reviews, though they didn't have as much meat as I usually pack into them, feel free to re-request me on my review thread on the forums. My moral obligation prevents me from reviewing further...
Author's Response: Hiya Liberty!
Thank you so very much for another lovely review! I really do appreciate your feedback. It means the world to me.
I'm so glad you enjoyed Remus's appearance in this chapter. I have to admit, Lupin is probably my favorite HP character. He just seems like a such a sweet guy. As to why Freddy is reluctant to be friends with him, they do have a rather strained history, which was established and more fully explored in my previous novel "Consumed". In short, Freddy and Remus didn't get off to a very good start when they first met. ;)
And yes, there are some slightly non-canon elements in both this story and its prequel. However, I have tried to keep all the AU aspects somewhat related to canon or at least in keeping with JKRâs major story arc. But as you mentioned, Hermione certainly wasn't infected with TB. I did take a little dramatic license there, hehe.
Again, thank you so much for the great review, Liberty! I will definitely drop by your thread in the near future and re-request for the next chapter. ^_^ I hope you have a pleasant weekend. Take care!