Well wasn't this just one of the most awesome things I've read in a while? :O HEY SEVVY! So, I said I'd get this to you by the New Year, yet here I am on the 8th... tch, dear, dear. Just what I'm like m'afraid. *Cowers in case wrath comes* But lets just hooold up the wrath, and I'll do the review first (and then you can kill me). XD
THIS WAS TOTALLY AWESOME. You could really feel Narciss's dedication and the desperation for Lucius to come home, and as this is multi-chaptered I anxiously await the next one! :D But to start off with something; characterization.
I loved Draco. Had to be said xD Such sweet innocence... (what happened, dude?!) and you're really great at showing that even Draco had a childhood. A time when he'd want to act immature, ask senseless questions and not quite bully everything he sees - although, perhaps holding the dragonfly by its wings could be foreshadowing in a sense? Or perhaps I'm looking too much into it, haha. xD Only thing is, at first he says "mother" twice, and other times he says "mum" - I wonder which one would be better? Because mother demonstrates the upbringing I think he would've had, but Mum is much more childish. But you can still be a sweet child with "Mother" so, idk. And to be honest, I don't even know why I care. o.O I guess I'm just annoying like that... (you know you love me ;D).
Narcissa was very good as well, and I think the only times we really see her in the book is when she's looking after Draco, so its definitely something easy to assume that she'd be very caring. She obviously really cares about him, (and about his father) and she acted like a really nice mother - bang on, I liked it! And her attitude towards the house elves too - kinder, nicer, it just brings out more character. Like with the cooking the food... maybe its just something to keep her busy? And her devotion, as mentioned. Could bring a tear to my eye... :')
Buuut... *sticks on annoying hat* ... I didn't much like Lucius. (PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!) He just seemed a little... brusque in my opinion. Like... the way I always felt it, he'd be quite polite to his wife, and maybe occasionally lose his temper at her, but not ignore her completely. Or perhaps my interpretation is completely wrong, and I fail? But its all down to creative license I think - if this Lucius fits in with the story better, then this Lucius RULES! :D
Moving on, here's some storyline love! (:< I can't say I've read many Lucius/Narcissa fics (this must be somewhere around my third, haha) but I'd like to say its pretty individual. I always assumed that it was probably an arranged marriage that they both hated, and Draco was just a result of that marriage to keep the Malfoy (and Black) family lines going. So its definitely interesting to read about something where it may have been a marriage of convenience for Lucius, but Narcissa may have actually loved him :O Shockhorror! I wonder how she'll end up dealing with that for the rest of her life? D: (Erm, chapter 2 pleaseandthankyou? :]) And I hope she stops devoting herself to Lucius (she kinda does, DH *duh*, James) because Draco deserves the attention more!
THIS WAS AWESOME. BELIEVE ME. :D
And this is usually the part where I stick on my "I'm-annoying-look-at-me-know-it-all-i-smell" hat, but actually I can't find anything to crit... WHICH IS RARE. Because I'm a snobby son of a benandjerry's ice cream, I always get annoyed with wrong grammar... but I couldn't find anything. *Laugh*. BE HAPPY. XD
(Because the "one more minutes?" part was SO awesome.)
This is a really fab start to a fic, and I can't wait to see the next chapter! Bring Jamesie the next chapter soon, pweeease! :)
By the way, *I* love you! :) (Even if I review late... *dies*)
See ya soon!
Love James xx
10/10 AND I give into wrath giving now... T_T
Author's Response: Jamesie!
*cowers in shame* It's been 9 months, my wrath died out but I dunno about yours though... >..< Yeah, I appreciated your long review but it was really long and I didn't know what to say so yeah, I ended up putting it off for a long time. =_=" sowwy.
Anyway, I'm glad you think that way. Actually, I did do that purposely. I was considering on having him pluck out the dragonfly's wings but then later decided against it. x3 :P
I totally know what you mean. And now I'm pretty confused about it myself. x3 Mother/Mum?
I ain't gonna kill you Jamesie. I know what you mean about Lucius because when I reread the story, I found that I mis-portrayed Lucius and that I'll have to edit it because I know I can do better without ruining the story but I'm too lazy *hence why no update yet*
Oh really? Now that you put that in my head, it won't get out. x3 I never thought about them being forced into marriage and them hating it but if I ever did, then I must've assumed that they would fall for each other later anyway. >.<
I'm gonna take that as a compliment and besides, it's rather rare seeing a "snobby son of a benandjerry's ice cream" like egoistic you boosting someone else's ego. :P Besides, I'm pretty nitpicky with my grammar and spelling myself and if I ever make a mistake, I'd love for it to be pointed out. And seeing as you haven't found any, YAY ME! X3
I'll do that.as soon as I'm not lazy. =_=" Thank you for taking the time to read and review dearest.
I loff you too!