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Review:momotwins says:
Hi Charlotte! *snowball* I picked this story to review because of the Oscar Wilde credit - love him. :)

I totally went "aww" at the end. True love! Very sweet. The memory of his killing a past girlfriend (did I get that right?) was really sad and horrifying. Poor Remus. Since you ask for critique, I think it works as a one-shot very well. People often put too much in or leave too much out. You've left out just enough to create an interesting backstory, but didn't fill the entire thing with backstory. I did think there was a tad too much flashback, but I'm not a big fan of them, so you can take that or leave it. Just opinion really. Let's see, formatting looks lovely, of course. I think you did well with characterization on Remus, and the brief glimpse of Molly Weasley. Tonks was good in this as well.

Some of the jumping-around between times in your narrative required a re-read - I thought the proposal was to Tonks and didn't notice it wasn't until I got to the end of the second flashback (which I also thought was about Tonks at first). I kind of like the vagueness there about the identity, because it's different from how I'd write it (and I like that). Now, you have one paragraph where Remus rages about memories haunting him, then the next paragraph he goes to the Shrieking Shack where memories no longer haunt him. It seems a bit odd, like it doesn't make sense with the internal logic of the story.

Small grammar issue:
The years old memories -> The years-old memories

Author's Response: Hello! :)

Thank you for the read! I never even heard of Oscar Wilde until the challenge I entered, but I'm glad I know about him now!

Anyway, thank you! Yes, you got the story right ^_^ Thanks for your opinion! There are a lot of flashbacks, but I think they're all needed to tell the story..? I'll definitely need to reread my piece and edit it after all these lovely reviews from the snowball fight :)

I'm a perfectionist, so it's nice that the formatting is lovely! :P That does sound a bit odd, I shall take a look at that as well. And also, thanks for pointing out that mistake :)

Thank you for the read and the lovely review :))


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