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Review:lia_2390 says:
Hey prettywishes!

I really enjoyed this first chapter, especially your characterisation of young Scorpius. For me, I got little glimpses of his personality and his perception of the generation he lives in currently - that being how the other houses treat the Slytherins. A lot of people have written similar but to me, it was always like that, just that the Slytherins were more boastful before the war.

I love how you described Scorpius' anxiety about the Quidditch match in a way people can relate...to any upcoming event actually.

I was a bit jealous of him having chocolate cake too, by the way.

And then there's the body. To be honest, I think you could have done more with Scorpius' reaction to finding it. Perhaps more description of how he felt, his actions, etc, not just saying he wasn't able to accept it. Mind you, I'm interested in finding out how Al got there in the first place. I'm a HUGE fan of murder mysteries!

Oh, another thing I wanted to point out...the Slytherin Common Room doesn't have a portrait, the opening is just a wall where when you say the password, a passageway opens to admit you.

Other than that, I rather enjoyed this and I'm going on to read chapter two.

Lia

Author's Response: Fist off, thank you for taking the time to leave such a detailed review!

I'm glad that you liked Scorpius, it took me awhile to work him out and how I wanted him to act, but in the end I was happy with him and the way that the Slytherins were in general. I really think that your right about it having always been like that, it's more of just the pride behind the house that's been lost.

I really struggled with Scorpius and the body because I've never found a body before so I've got no idea how I'd react. But there will be more with that in later chapters which I think is more realistically, but I think I might need to revisit this chapter and fix that a bit, because it does seem to be lacking something.

*facepalm* I knew that about the Slytherin common room, I don't know how I missed that one! But anyways, that you so much for the lovely review!

Megan


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