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Review:xLauriePotter says:
Hello, Laurie here.

First of all, Thank you for participating in the challenge!

I think that this piece was written with the correct amount of tension, emotion and humour. I liked the part based around Victoire not being able to cook, it’s good seeing a Weasley who hasn’t inherited Molly Weasley’s cooking abilities, so congrats to you for being original here. “Normally, it wouldn’t have bothered me, I would just order take-away” makes Victoire my kinda’ girl. I don’t normally find I can relate to Victoire much, she’s normally too much like Fleur (who I certainly don’t relate too).

I like how you included the French in the fic, I think it had a fabulous effect.
“He was right the longest phrase I'd ever heard him say was, well actually never mind. That isn't important” really made me laugh! I think its important to have some humour in a sad story, just to break it up a little so this was a good thing to put in, for me anyway.
“Tu as brisé mon cœur//You broke my heart” was a really nice touch, I actually sort of choked a little.

I really like how you ended this. Am I right by reading the him “waiting” for her part as linking with Teddy waiting for her while she was in France?

Overall, I really like the plot of this story. I’ll get back to you about the competition results.
Laurie x

Author's Response: Hi! Thank You for taking the time to review. You challenge was great fun. :)
You know, I never even thought about it like that. I haven't read any Victoire/Teddy fics before. I was just going with what I thought. My kinda girl too. Chinese is my food of choice haha.

I think it is right. It has been two years since I did french, so it took me a while. I felt I had to include it though, with the fact I said she went to France for her last year. That line is inspired by the fact, I can only say one semi- comples thing in french. It is from the song Lady Marmalade, which is why I can say it so well.

I was trying to show she had a softer side. Everyone I asked told me to characterise her like Fleur. So, I edited a bit. I actually do love that line because is it so simple.

No, I was trying to show he knew she would follow him and that he wasn't giving up hope. However, your idea sounds better, so I am going to go with that. Yes, that is exactly what I intended.

Sounds good :)

Ginny45/RandomRed xxx


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