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Review:massieblockrox says:
That was a good start. I just have one suggestion. Well, two, actually.

When the characters talk, have them say "I'm", not I am. It just sounds more natural. Also, remember commas! They make it so much easier to read a story!

However, I really liked this, and am excited to read chapter two!

Author's Response: sorry this is so late. I got "spammed" all at once by reviews and am having a hard time finding time to respond! Thanks for the review though. It is much appreciated. I definitely will follow your suggestions. The I am maybe spell check because it automatically fixes those for me because of school. Thanks again for the reviews!
Am. Ginny :)

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