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Review:williamy98 says:
i like it but it is just a tad to fast paced. it sometimes pay for u to do that but it can also hurt as i found out with my first story the love that killed a tyrant look it up on here and read the chapter posted. i do however like ur idea just try and slow the story down a little explain some things in better detail. thats the only problem i see and a few grammatical errors but every writer makes those im sure i have some in my new story Harry and Hermione the two heirs of hogwarts im waiting for the chapter validation on that one but if u want read it when it gets validated all in all i give u a nine

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