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Review:draconian88 says:
Hi! This is Saeli from the forums, here for your review.

Whilst reading through your work, I would like to suggest something; it would be details. Try adding details into your stories to lead the reader into imagining what's in your head. Great writers in a way are like painters. Their canvas is the readers mind, and the medium they use are words. Adding details, I also find, add interest for the reader. Have you read Anne Rice's work? She has a way with details that would take you away and make you feel like you are actually there. JKR too has that magic :).

I also noticed that the flow was slightly fast paced. If you are planning for this story to be a Novella, then by all means take your time in developing your story.

I hope the suggestions I made helped you in some way.


Author's Response: I'll try to work on revisions when i get a beta. Thank you for the review

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