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Review:Elizabeth_Black says:
Hey there! It's Elizabeth23 from the forums :)

I just have to say that the summary is just so cute! I seriously went "awww" when I read it.

I really really liked how this appeared, at first, to be a cute, sweet, innocent childhood story, and it turned to something bitter. The change was seamless, and it just seemed natural, if you get what I mean.

I really liked how you wrote Petunia and Lily, and portrayed their sibling relationship. Petunia was brilliant, and she was clearly the "older sister" - the way she acted at the wedding was perfect.

Your characterisation of Severus was both sweet and heart-breaking. He was adorable at the wedding with the brooch, and when he said that it matched his brides eyes was just so gorgeous. And then, once he got home, all the sweetness disappeared. I felt so sorry for him!

I thought that you wrote Severus' parents very well, despite how twisted their marriage was. I did like how you didn't bombard us readers with swearing and threats. Sometimes, with stories like this, is even more effective if you leave things mostly unsaid. So, for their marriage and the fights, it was so well written I felt sick just reading, as this story was really entrancing, no matter how much you want to look away.

It was sad how Lily was waiting in the playground at night for Severus. That was so bittersweet, especially how you then went over to Severus' point of view. It was so sad :'(

The ending! Oh my, that was just amazing! I totally didn't see that coming at all, and it finished the story in a bit more of a neutral mood, with a few unanswered questions, which I really liked.

There weren't really any grammar problems, just go over it to tidy up the paragraphs - it wouldn't take any more than 15 minutes :)

I really loved this story. It was entrancing, well written and very memorable, so you have done a fantastic job! Well done - 10/10 :)

~Lizzie

Author's Response: This was such a long and thoughtful review. I thank you VERY much for taking the time to write and reflect on my story. I'm sorry that this response has come so late.

I do appreciate it!! :)


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