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Review:Meg_ says:
Ok this is much much better! I'm very happy with the way this looks. You still have a few minor spelling errors in here. Also I'd like to comment that I think you have to work on the Luna characterization. She's very stiff it feels like in the chapter before this with the whole pillow throwing and now she's mentioning nargles again. You've got to find a balance. But I am loving the plot and the way this story flows. You are very good at making Lily a real four year old. A lot of writers have trouble writing a toddler but you are doing great with it. Anyway I'd give this a well deserved 8.
~Meg

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