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Review:dramione_girl82 says:
You did really well with the story line, but chapter 2 to chapter 3 didn't seem to flow to well. I think it would help if there was more of an explanation of what was happening and why. Try including details about the situation and the people involved. It will help to make the transition between the two chapters easier. Detail is very important.

Your writing is amazing, and your grammar is just as great! Don't worry, with a little revision the two chapters will blend greatly :) Let me know if you would like any ideas, I will try to help the best I can.

Author's Response: I agree with you. I'm going to have to edit this chapter, because the previous two have been edited, but I never edited this one. I think that's why this chapter doesn't seem to flow with the rest.

thank you for the offer, I will sure do. Thanks once again for the review!

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