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Review:Lady of Tears says:
Oh, it turned out more than ok. I loved this! It was way beautiful, and I loved the poem aspect of it. You have some really beautiful descriptions, and I think you had a really good balance of horror, without going overboard.

As far as pointers, sometimes you use really big words. Like, diaphanous. It's not a big thing, because you can still get the idea, but it kind of took me out of the story. I'd actually love to see this story continue, haha. Anyways, I loved it, good job!

Author's Response: Oh, thank you! I was really, really keen to get in those whacking great extended metaphors about death and marriage (:

And, whoops, that's me being a prat :') I should probably re-think that., maybe switch 'diaphanous' (wow, that really is, erm, obscure) for 'flimsy' or something. I'll bear that in mind (:

I've got no plans to continue this particular story but Lorcan's definitely on my list of characters to write in the future. He's got such a lovely name!

Thanks for reviewing! :D


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