Firstly I'd like to apologize for not getting this review to you sooner; my life has been incredibly hectic these past few weeks and it's been hard for me to get anything done. Due to my preseverances to my beta responsibilities and the House Cup, I haven't had time to read this story until this evening, so I sincerely hope that you this hasn't bothered you; I wouldn't blame you if you were a little annoyed right now. Anyway, lets talk about Remus, he's a lot more interesting.
Remus has always been without a doubt one of my favourite characters, so you wouldn't believe how happy I was to find a review request on my thread for a Remus story. Due to the way he is portrayed in the books, I'm quite used to reading about the wize and just wizard who's always there for everyone. The emotion that you managed to convery in this one shot brought out a completley different side of him that JK rarely ever showed in the series. You showed a weaker, more corruptable side to him, which makes for a nice change from the brave, dying hero he is exhaustedly portrayed as on the archives. Your depiction of his love for Tonks and his cosequental heartbreak over her death was spot on; I could really feel his pain whilst reading this.
The emotive language almost brought a tear to my eye; which is saying something because that very rarely happens with me. I also love your use of description; you use the perfect balance, not too little and not too much. My only suggestion would have to be to leave the underlining and boldening of the quotes out. I know I may sound quite petty at the moment, but it kind of disrupted the flow of the writing. When read aloud they aren't meant to stand out, but the bold and underlined text give that impression off to the reader. My suggestion would be to instead list the quotes in the author's note to let the readers know who they're by.
I also really enjoyed the structure. At first I wasn't getting all of the time-period switching, but after a while I could really gather the effect they were having on me, and they contributed greatly to the highly emotional atmosphere in this story.
Overall this was a great One Shot, I can't really find any fault with it, and trust me, I don't often say that. I'm happy that you requested I read this, please feel free to request again, I'd love to read more of your stuff.
Author's Response: Hey!
Don't worry about the lateness - I don't notice these things much, being busy myself! I'm not bothered at all, and not annoyed at all! In fact, I'd like to say thank you for your dedication in getting it done, and a huge thank you for such a long, awesome, helpful review!
Thank you very much! I'm glad I portrayed Remus in a totally different way (without meaning to)! I'm glad that I was able to invoke such a powerful emotion! I understand your 'flow of the writing' thing, I'll take another look at it, and possibly change it!
Thanks very much! I thought the time jumps might be a bit confusing for some readers, but judging by the reviews, they aren't!
Awh, thank you very much! I'm very grateful to your amazingly helpful review! I'm quite surprised by all the reviews saying it was very emotional, I'm usually (actually never) emotional at all, so I'm surprised, but quite pleased!
Thanks very much Katie :) I appreciate it heaps! :D