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Review:melian says:
Hi! Here with your review!

Wow, what a story you have here. I'll do my inner critic stuff first, though to be frank I didn't notice much, aside from the ubiquitous American spellings. But you didn't ask for those to be pointed out so I'm happy to ignore them. Apart from that, the only thing I raised an eyebrow at was the word acclimated, because where I live we say "acclimatised". However, I've had people ask me if "acclimatised" is a word, so I think that might be one of those people-from-different-countries-use-slightly-different-words things. In other words, ignore my ramblings. This was fine.

Okay, fine may not be the right word, considering the subject matter of this fic. You weren't kidding when you said it was dark, but then again that's not a bad thing. Dark stories certainly have their place, and this wasn't over the top by any means. But I thought it was a really good story.

The POV changes, which often come across as stilted or awkward in fanfiction, I thought worked really well in this, and it wasn't difficult to work out whose perspective we were following even though you didn't spell it out. If nothing else, I tip my hat to you for that, because I have read so many bad POV switches in fanfic that it was like a breath of fresh air.

I will admit that the ancient magic that Fred called upon to release them did throw me a little, mainly because it wasn't clear exactly what he did. Clearly it was an embedded, dormant kind of magic (I can't think of a better word than that right now, sorry), in that it didn't require props like wands or potions, just sheer emotion and force of desperation ... this is certainly not inconsistent with canon, but I think it's the first time I've seen that sort of magic being used consciously and deliberately. I liked the subtlety of Fred picking the wand from a dead Death Eater - the fact that the dead hand had a wand at all proved it wasn't George's hand - after the explosion, too. You managed to convey a lot in very few words in that bit, which is something to be prized I think.

In fact, I'm starting to think that I should have written this review when my brain was working better, because I'm just not finding the right words for what I want to say, and you did that so perfectly all through this story that I'm feeling quite inadequate.

Overall, then, a very good story I thought. The bond that Fred and George had, which was demonstrated over and over in the canon, worked so well as an integral part of this story, and their communication without words was one of the most poignant images I've read in fanfic for a long time. I can see how it would have been difficult to write, but I think you should be proud of this fic. It's great. You did a fantastic job.

cheers, Mel

Author's Response: Wow, three months to respond to a review. You've probably given me up for dead by now. All I can say is life went really, really crazy this spring and I had to let the internet hobbies slide for a while in order to survive. So sorry I've kept you waiting because of it, but must tell you how much I love this review you gave me! It is completely awesome!!

LOL. Thanks for the critiques. I can barely spell with American spellings. I would be doomed if I tried British ones, so I'm glad you are able to ignore them. :)

I am glad you liked the story despite the dark subject matter, although liked seems like an odd word choice given what this was about. Hopefully you know what I mean by that.

Thanks so much for the compliments on the POV changes! I really, really didn't want to have to spell out which was which as I felt it made the fic lose some of its power, but I was afraid people might get lost without it. In the end I just left them and crossed my fingers, so to hear that you liked them makes me feel much better. Thanks!

The magic Fred used was...well, I guess you could say author's choice. I'm not sure I could justify it with canon, but I don't think canon outright dicounts something like that existing. Mostly, I was trying to show that somethings defy description or explanation, in the real world or the magical one, such as the bond between twins as close as Fred and George. What happened here was how my muse led me to convey that, but that doesn't mean I was trying to go for canon.

As for the compliment about saying a lot with very little - you seriously have me blushing. That is one of the coolest comments anyone has ever made about my writing and I thank you bunches!

No, not inadequate! Extremely cool review! You seriously made my whole week when I got this, and rereading it now to respond to it has me grinning like crazy person again. Thanks so much for taking the time to read this!


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