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Review:lucekd08 says:
OK, so this isn't going to be a review for just the chapter, it's going to be for the entire story (got that?). Anyway, overall, I thought it was a really cute story (the kind you can't stop smiling at). The first half was a little slow, but I enjoyed your style of wrtiting (a lot of other writers on here try to write like JK Rowling) so I kept reading. It just felt a little too parallel to the fifth book (well, that may be due to the fact that I'm re-reading the seires again and just finished the fifth book). In chapter 8, maybe 9, I forgot which one, Mrs. Weasley talks to Ron and Hermione about their love lives when I saw that she says the same thing I was like "oh, it's so repetive," but after seeing that she did that with all her kids I thought it was a really good idea. My final thing I want to say was that I wish you were a little more discriptive of the kiss between Ron/Hermione. Not physically (you covered that) but more emotionally (and don't use 'electricity'. you already used that describing Harry/Ginny's kiss). Like, what I would use is:
"as soon as their lips made contact, both of them felt a wave of passion flow through them. Everything around them seemed insignificant (woah, i totally spelled that WRONG! maybe) as long as they were with one another. Hermione instantly knew that she could never love another man. Meanwhile, Ron just wanted to hold her tight and never let her go, keeping her safe and letting her know that she would be his forever."
Infact, that's so good maybe I'll use it (haha!)
Um, if you get the time, maybe you could read my story? It's called "Overreacting". It follows Ron and Hermione three years after the second Wizarding War and i'm putting in lots of twists :). I'm really excited 'cause it's my first story to go up on here. Right now, I only have 1 chapter up, but I have about 6 written.
Hope you enjoy my critique (I think that's how you spell it. If not, oh well)

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