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Review:Rose_Weasley123 says:
Hello! It's magicmuggle12 from the forums, here to review your entry. Since I'm doing this for the challenge, I'm going to focus mainly on how you coped with the lack of dialogue, and how much the one line did for your story. If you want a more in depth critique, feel free to PM me and I'll see what I can do ;).

I think you did really well with this challenge! This piece did not feel as if it was lacking in anything, despite having only one line of dialogue. You included some lovely description, both of surroudings and feelings. It was a very powerful piece. It was an interesting effect, putting the line of dialogue to the end of the piece, and one that I think worked quite well. It served to reinforce the theme that ran through the entire piece, and it helped the reader connect with Scorpius's emotions.

One thing I noticed that I especially loved was the repetition of 'red'. It tied the piece together really well, and it was an effective theme for the piece.

All in all, I think this was a very effective piece, and I think you've done very well with the challenge. Good luck!

-Becca

Author's Response: Hey there!

I've got to say, I loved your challenge. I depend on spoken words to outline a lot of my major fic, and the lack of speech presented a challenge in the literal sense.

Thanks for your encouragement, when do we hear back?

xE


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