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Review:Burke says:
Hey, I really enjoyed reading this. It was written very well. The grammer seemed fine to me, nothing stood out as being wrong so on the most basic form, it's good there. I felt helpless reading it, and I believe that was your goal, and I must comment that you've written it well.

Despite this we don't really get to know either Scorpius or Rose, we do in small doses, Rose is a strong woman who tries to not show pain whilst Scorpius loves her but betrays his feelings of love to her by agreeing with Lucius' beliefs. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, but I just thought I would mention it :-)

I enjoyed this, the wounds, fighting, the emotions were all written very well. I enjoyed this piece and it was a pleasure to read.

I think the last line was sad and sweet, but am unsure about the 'so, so sorry' it seemed a little umm, i'm not sure, unrealistic? I realise that it would be ridiculously difficult to think what he would say, but it did work well.

Good luck with this competition, you've done a great job. Congratulations! :-)

Feel free to request with any other stories that you have, I really liked your style of writing. It was very emotive, descriptive and intriguing. It was great :-) Good work.

Author's Response: Why thank you Burke.

Most of my one shots fail to capture character in any way -- it's a fault I fail to consider.

I appreciate your comment on the 'so, so sorry'. It might sound a little strange, but I wasn't sure that the line was long enough.

Thank you for the quick and very deep review!


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