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Review:melian says:
Hi again! Yes, I'm back, as promised, and I'm trying to get through my hefty review backlog ... and you're the first cab off the rank! I'd like to catch up on this story and a couple of others I'm reading so I'm trying very hard to do that. So, hopefully you'll be hearing from me a bit more.

Now, the first thing I noticed while reading this (aside from a bit of Sirius dialogue that sounded a bit awkward to me, but that's probably just personal taste) was the reference to Sherlock Holmes, ie "Good sleuthing, Sherlock". Nothing wrong with the quote but I do wonder whether Sirius, as a pureblood and one brought up in the House of Black, would be familiar with Muggle icons like Holmes. And whether Aria (she's a pureblood, right?) would in turn get the reference. Of course, you probably have several thousand ways of explaning it, but it just grabbed my attention.

Oh, and the Animagi thing - from that dialogue it sounds like James got the idea from a book he received in fifth year for Christmas. Didn't they start that process in third year, and only perfect it in fifth? Or is my memory playing funny tricks on me?

And, finally, you're dropping into Americanisms again with "broom closet" - in the UK (and in Australia, I thought?) they're more commonly known as "broom cupboards".

Okay, enough of that. You don't want to read my rants about canon compliance and the like, do you? You want to know how I'm liking your story.

Wow, cliffy! I do love it. And I liked McGonagall playing matchmaker - or, at least, I hope that's what she's doing. I am firmly of the opinion that Dumbledore only made those two Head Boy and Girl in the hope they'd get together, or at least it formed part of his rationale, so to have more senior staff going along with that idea just makes me smile.

The fight between Sirius and James was a good idea, but some of the text felt a bit awkward, though I do note that you've reworked some of that lately so I appreciate that, like all good stories, it's in a constant state of evolution. Generally I do think it worked, and I could definitely see James blowing his top over his best mate badmouthing the love of his life. And the flirtation also went well, you are definitely building up the sexual tension between him and Aria.

Which brings me to, the broom cupboard? Do I assume that he was doing exactly what James suggested, or is there more to it than that? And, if it was that, is he just working his way through the school like he seems to in most fics? I'm curious. I'm more than curious. As you know I'm a bit nuts when it comes to him and I'm still working out exactly how you've characterised him.

And, well, that last scene. Transfiguration partners is good, and Lily really needs to bite the bullet and just apologise so they can start talking again. So this looks like a good way to set that in motion.

Looking good! Hope to be back soon.

cheers, Mel

Author's Response: Wow! This is exciting to have this big a review! You're far too kind coming back and reviewing. I mean I'm very surprised you even make it through all of your reviews! :)

Ahh yes. The Sherlock reference. Your the second to pick up on it. Obviously it was a mistake a first.. but I just decided to leave it in there. I think Lily would been the reason Aria knew.. and I imagine that Sirius, after he left home, that he would have become much more aware of the muggle world. Not a heaps convincing explanation, but I figure it would do.

Yeaaah, you're correct again. Unfortunately, I'm not heaps bound to canon as you are. I wish I was, but then my mind just ends up wandering and I do a little bit of changing you. You're perfectly right though. They did begin it back in third. So smart those boys are! :)

Lol again, another issue I have to talk to my beta about. She is doing such a fantastic job, but I sometimes forget to look closely at the words she changes. Orrr..it could have been my fault entirely.. but I imagine I would have said cupboard though. However, I have never heard of a broom cupboard before other than in Harry.

Haha! I agree with you! I totaly reckon he was just been sneaky and made those two Heads to get them together as well. And it also makes me smile too, to think that others were in on it. Good on you McGonagall!

Yeaaah. I actually re-read the start of that chapter recently and didn't really think it fit at all. I thought it was kinda out of nowhere and went too quick. Again, unfortunately this is when I didn't plan the chapters at all and I just made them up from the top of my head. I think when I go back and do some massive edits, I might be able to fix it a bit. Until then I just have to grin and bare it haha. Thanks for the nice words though!

Oh how I love and hate sexual tension! :)
And I think you're talking about Sirius right? If I'm correct I think you're talking about the part where he says he has just come back from ravishing some girl? lol. Hmm. I may be talking about the wrong part.. or the wrong character entirely.
Hopefully, whoever it is lol, oyu will work them out soon! hhaha.

Thank you so much for the wonderful review. I plan to get onto your review this afternoon once I make myself start writing this 13th chapter. I have had no motivation lately.
Anyway, thanks again!


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